There’s this thing that happens whenever I speak about or write about women’s issues—things like dress codes, rape culture, and sexism.
I get the comments: Aren’t there more important things to worry about? Is this really that big of a deal?
Aren’t you being overly sensitive?
Are you sure you’re being rational about this?
Every. Single. Time. And every single time I get frustrated. Why don’t they get it?
I think I’ve figured out why.
They don’t know.
Many people are calling for long-term solutions to stop and prevent
similar abuse. The authors of this post have recommendations, based on our
combined 40+ years of community management experience in the fields of
computer security, hackerspaces, free and open source software, and
non-profits. In four words, our recommendation is: No more rock stars.
Have you ever wondered why you sometimes feel inferior to or put down by
a someone, and then notice that another time they are reacting to you as
though you were superior to them or putting them down? Rank differences
are the key contributor to conflicts and their escalation. Having rank
awareness gives you an insight into what is happening in a conflict.
As a 20-year veteran of the tech industry, I’m familiar with calls for
“civility” in discourse — and the harm they often do to diversity and
inclusion.